Me, myself and I

It’s only recently, in the last few years that I have learned to accept people for who they are and where they are within their journeys. I was frustrated for years prior and occasionally I still feel the same frustration with people not being better humans; to be kinder, more compassionate, empathetic and considerate to others. I never thought I was asking for much for people to be conscious of their actions and to be present in the moment.

I vividly remember a moment in 2017 where I was venting my frustrations to a friend and she said, “The definition of misery is not accepting things for the way they are and always trying to change them to what you think they should be.”

BOOM!

At that moment I realised two important things. One, I was doing harm to myself, losing my inner peace, becoming miserable at that moment and lowering my vibrations. Two, I was expecting others to act the way I thought they should and see things the way I saw them; wanting them to be more like me! I was always so bitterly disappointed when people didn’t do what I would have done in the same situation.

I realised that I was projecting myself onto these people! Insert *Brain implosion*

I got so entangled in this idea of everybody being more like me and on the same level of spiritual awakening that I was on, I couldn’t see past my own inflated spiritual ego! I realised I needed to start accepting people for who they are and appreciate where each person was within their own journeys.

Honestly speaking, sometimes it’s a lot easier said than done, I mean, I was doing it for a long time until I woke up to it. There are even some people who will never realise that they project themselves onto other people with their beliefs and values until it’s pointed out to them, if that even ever happens. You see it happen a lot within romantic relationships; the partner trying to mold the other person into who they want them to be; saying things like, “You should be more like blank!” or “why can’t you be more like … ?” It happens all-the-time and until you become conscious of it, you won’t realise you’re doing the same thing.

Let's go even deeper and consider another level. I’ve learnt through this process that others are simply a reflection of ourselves, right, and so people come in and out of our lives for one reason or another; whether it’s for us to teach them something or for them to teach us something.

When a person triggers an emotional reaction out of you, instead of losing your shit, like I used to do and let’s be honest, I still do occasionally! Stop within that moment and self-reflect. Ask yourself why you are being triggered. Is there something you may need to learn or see within yourself? Do you feel the need to self-project your actions or beliefs?

The most powerful question you can start with is, WHY!? The answers that lie behind this one simple, three-letter word can open your mind and your entire world to new possibilities. Ask it often! Because you never know where the answers may lead you.